Tuesday, June 7, 2016

My Life and Top Gun

A month ago I lost my father.  He battled a long time with a terrible disease called Multiple System Atrophy (MSA).  The loss has been hard even though I know that he is in Heaven and is no longer in pain.  Somehow, even knowing that he is no longer in pain and is with our Jesus in heaven, there is nothing that can prepare anyone for the individual experience of being left behind.

The other day I was having one of the down moments of the ups and downs I experience daily now as I work through the grieving process.  All I could think of was the part in Top Gun where Maverick is distraught after Goose dies.  All I can remember thinking is that I am desperate to get to the point in the movie where "Maverick is re-engaging...".

I am praying to re-engage....I have had some moments where I am firing on all cylinders, and then I hit a backfire.  I run out of energy.  I lose focus.  Nothing is important.

I guess even at the point where Maverick re-engaged, he still had to take a minute afterward to silently say goodbye to Goose when he threw his dog tags in the sea.  Maverick's re-engagement wasn't permanent...but it was a big step.

I think I need to find a way to re-engage intentionally knowing that at some point the habit of engagement will be established and I'll find that lovin' feeling again....

It's the little things...

Friday, May 27, 2016

100 Dreams

I recently read a blog post.  I think it was by Laura Vanderkam but I am not sure.  In it she was suggesting a book called Playing Big (I am reading now and am fascinated by it).  In addition to the book she talked about an exercise of doing a list of 100 Dreams.  I took her up on the challenge.

I was hard.

Harder than I thought.

I mean really, 100 things doesn't seem that much, but when you are trying to think of things you haven't done that you want to do, it can get a bit tougher.  I got through about 30 before I really had to think, but I re-read this list today.  A month later, a crazy month at that, and I just marveled about the things that I put in there.  Things that are fun and totally achievable.  Things that make me smile.

I suggest to anyone to make a list of 100 Dreams.  Write it out, refer to it when you need a smile or motivation and work to cross those babies off!

(I am working on one just now...Write at least one blog post per week!)

Happy Friday!